Thursday, March 24, 2011

Yesterday the hubby came home from work and I was sitting at my desk in front of the computer, but I wasn't using the computer. I was just holding the baby and sitting there. He asked me how I was doing and I said, "Well, I'm not sure. I feel weird." He replied, "What do you mean?" I explained, "I don't feel like cleaning, cooking, showering, playing with the kids, watching TV, blogging, exercising, going outside, shopping, or even eating. I have no motivation for anything." "Do you need a nap?" he asked. "No, I don't want to sleep the rest of my day away," I stated.

I was really struggling. I didn't want to go to sleep and feel like I wasted so much time, but I couldn't think of one single thing I actually could do or wanted to do. You see, it's that fun time of the month for me. Yup, you know what I'm talking about...PMS (I'm sorry if this topic offends you, but it has to be talked about. It's not exactly going away.). Except I have PMS on steroids. It takes so much out of me. I lose motivation, I'm extremely tired and sluggish, and I don't sleep well. For some reason, this month has been even worse.

I can tell my body is totally out of whack by simply viewing the super acne that's persisted even when I've used my usually full proof acne wash. Every morning I wake up with a new zit in a new place. I've also been waking up multiple times at night covered in sweat, but freezing.

So, unshowered, unkempt, unrested, and unmotivated is how the hubby found me yesterday. He encouraged me to go get a pedicure and get out of the house for a while. "You will feel better," he pressed. I didn't feel like going anywhere, but I knew he was right and out I went.

It was good for me to get out of our tiny apartment for a while and, of course, to get a pedicure (Tip: No matter how unmotivated, do not dry shave your legs before a pedicure. The exfoliating scrub becomes an excruciating scrub:).

I came home to my sweet hubby and kids feeling a little better, but still restless, so I analyzed my feelings a little as I ate dinner with the fam. I realized I needed to give some individual attention to the Commander and Sassafras. The hubby held the baby boss while I gave ten minutes of undivided attention to my two oldest.

First the Commander came into my room to snuggle with me and talk about his day. Our conversation consisted mostly of him asking cute questions like, "What if animals could talk and wear clothes like in my Gingerbread Man book?" We also made a bow tie out of the skittles wrapper he was fidgeting with and talked about how we would always have snuggle time even when he was older. We hugged and I told him to go get his sister for her special time and he said, "Mommy, I love you one hundred gazillion, trillion, million, tillion, bagillion, hickillion, more times than anyone." Back at ya kid.
Here is the Commander modeling the sweet skittles
bow tie we created.
The Commander desperately wanted to take a picture of me. He was
hurt that I didn't want to put it on the blog so here it is. This is gutsy people.

While Sassafras and I snuggled on my bed we talked about her relationships with friends and school. Because she is in school, I often ask her if there's anything important she needs to talk to me about or any secrets she needs to share. I'm constantly letting her know that she can tell me anything, even if she's done something wrong. She said, "I know I can tell you things mommy." "What kind of bad things do people do and then tell their mommies?" I proceeded to tell her that some kids lie, steal, or do drugs and drink when they get older. I also said there may be a time someone does something bad to her that she feels ashamed to talk about. Her response was, "Oh, well I don't have any of that to talk about so can I ask you some questions now?" "Sure," I said laughing.

She asked me who my first,  second, and third crushes were. This made me laugh and think...it was hard to remember. But, I told her a few. She told me she had a crush on a boy in her class who sits at her table. I asked her to tell me about him and she said, "He's a lot like daddy. He has reddish hair, glasses, and he's the nicest boy in the class." We got out her class picture and she showed me her crush. I could tell she was so glad to share her secret with me.

Ten minutes of time with my kids was great. And you know what? I felt so much more fulfilled than I had all day. At the end of the day I laid in bed thinking of what was most helpful for me in overcoming some of my recent struggles. It was definitely a husband who put my needs first and the time with my kids.

If you are a parent I highly encourage you to take ten minutes each day to give undivided attention to each child. It will make everyone more at peace. Now, I just need to plan some time to put the hubby first. It's hard to juggle everything isn't it?

Also, thanks to everyone who's shared moving tips with me. I can tell you've all moved a time are two and sure know what you're doing. I'm going to give people a little longer to send me their moving tips and will draw the name of the winner of the hat tomorrow (read this post for more details).

Don't forget this Saturday's kick off discussion of the first DHBH book club book, Prayers for Sale by Sandra Dallas.

Have an awesome day friends!

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